Why me

Sometime I just want to dead the pain is so bad this lupus take over me. God help me please I'am a fight but sometime I just can't fight I get so weak sometime into I pick up my head god please help me please please please I don't want to give up but I hurt and weak every day

I know god hear me

This past month this lupus be act up I was in the hospital and in so much pain I call on god and told him I can't take it no more can he take my pain away I did not mean it but sometime I get tired of the pain it hurt so bad I could not wash up cook for my self.....I just want my life back

Lupus awareness

Do lupus make me mean or do the medications

My family say I'am mean but I don't think I'am mean they just don't understand how I feel sometime I just want to be alone. I love my family and my bay he never went no were 7 years and we still going hard I have 3 girl friends the over friends I had never come to see me I guess you find out who your real friends is when you get sick or need something. I just start thing about my life and I guess the over side of me come out sometime the mean one come out but I will like to tell my family and my real friends I'am sorry.

I love my mom

I love my mom so much...I don't know what I will do with out her she all ways there for me and help me out when I need her 

Wow

I have not been on here in a long time but my lupus sister Sasha was talking about a blog that we should do to get more lupus awareness out there and let people know how lupus effect us. My life been hard because of lupus but I try sometime not to let the pain get to me but lately I been in so much pain into I just want to cry sometime I just stay in my apartment by my self my family say I'am mean but they don't understand how I feel and how much pain I be in I can't walk that good no more I can't do my hair no more it hurt cause I love doing hair I want to school for hair and sometime I ask god why me what did I do so bad to have lupus but I love my lupus sister that I'am in the support group with and I love my online lupus sister and brother I don't know what I would have done with out them they understand how I feel. I'am going to try my best to wight everyday on here but good night it is 2am I should be sleep 🙏💜💜💜💜💜🙏

Thank God!!!!!

God is good becaues a year ago I was in and out the hospital. Iam get better now it been hard but I'am a fight this pacemake and lupus will not stop me at all. My family say I'am mean but I'am not they just dont understand what I'am going thou sometime I feel so sick into I dont want to get out of bed I just dont say noting they just dont now how I feel I just want my life back it hard fight this lupus I need my own apartment so bad dont like live here I dont want nobody to feel bad becoues I dont want to live with them but I got to go this damn lupus stop my life I will have been in my own apartment but I cant work right now I'am not going to say never because you never now what god can do but I got money come in from social security so thats good. I dont now why sometime I dont like my family but I be fight it, it so hard god help me why do I feel this way I just go in my room and dont talk to nobody thery ask me why I'am in my room and I say becoues I just need to be by myself  sometime god for gave me I dont know why I feel like this. God help me get my own apartment just to get away from them maybe of I get away I will feel better about them but I love my family they is there for me I just mad with the world right now. Thank you god.